I think fandoms at large and I are parting ways for a bit.

[meganbmoore]

I am officially ignoring fandoms of all kinds for a week or so. Seriously. Maybe I’m just super prickly lately, but I CANNOT LOOK at anything in any fandom lately without getting pissed off. Seriously, not even Dresden Files. Why? Ignoring the steadily increasing Harry/Bob, Harry/Thomas and Harry/Morgan slash (And people! That’s ward/mentor, *spoilery but major no-no for slashing-or het-relationship in my book* and persecuted/persecutor there!) I have seen a few "Murphy isn’t good enough for Harry" bits lately.

Ok, lets get one thing straight: 90% of the time in fictional pairings (or at least, the ones in things I bother to stick with), it is the WOMAN who could do better than what she gets, not the man. Yes, that applies to many of my ships, too. Most of that "she’s not good enough" for him garbage? What you really mean is "she’s not as good for him as I would be," usually under the disguise of "this other person-who I choose-is better for him, because my understanding of him is better(than his OR his creator’s.)" Get over it. And you know what? It’s not about who could "do better" or whether one is "good enough" for the other, it’s about whether or not the other person is the one who will make that person happy, and if they’re the one they choose to be with. Period. Get over it. If people were only with somebody "good enough" for them on all levels, the human race would be a LOT smaller. (As a random aside: canon portraying something as one person "settling" for another also pisses me off, but that’s something else altogether.)

And you know what, back to Dresden Files? Could Murphy do better than a man who keeps secrets from her, unintentionally endangers her life and risks her career, and regularly gets her involved in dangerous, out-of-this-world situations with dangerous people that are WAY out of what should be her league? Oh yes she could. Could Harry do better than a woman who puts up with his regularly sending her life to the crapper, stands by his side against all odds and supports and defends him, even if she gives him hell for the secrets and trouble? No, he couldn’t. If those two ever get their act together and get together the one "settling" will NOT be Harry. But again, THAT’S NOT WHAT IT’S ABOUT.

(And, seriously, HOW MANY PAIRINGS DOES THAT DESCRIBE???)

Uhm…anyway, yeah, NO IDEA why I’m so amazingly prickly on the fandom front lately, but I am. I’m not visiting websites and ignoring all communities(save purely news ones) for at least a week. If anyone sees anything you think I’d want to know about, let me know. (Obviously, still reading f-list posts and such, because that's different.)

Comments

[kingcrankycat.livejournal.com]

*is so proud*

[meganbmoore.livejournal.com]

Just be proud of my restraint.

[kingcrankycat.livejournal.com]

Yes, I'm proud of that too.

[magicnoire.livejournal.com]

Well. Someone just sold me on Ergo Proxy by telling me the gender roles were reversed and that it was the guy who was emotionally vulnerable and head over heels and it was the girl who's the stone cold hardass.

[meganbmoore.livejournal.com]

Now, that is a major plus. I was pretty much planning to watch it anyway, and that moves it up.

[mscongeniality.livejournal.com]

That's pretty much true, though basically every character is completely insane in their own special way.

[meganbmoore.livejournal.com]

Personally, I fully endorse insane characters...

[mscongeniality.livejournal.com]

I didn't say it was a bad thing...it's just something to keep in mind when all the batshit starts spreading.

[lesbiassparrow.livejournal.com]

No woman is ever worthy of any man. I know this because Christian romances tell me so.

[meganbmoore.livejournal.com]

OF COURSE THEY ARE!

As long as they stay barefoot, pregnant, cook every meal to perfection, handwash all the clothes and never think without permission.

[lesbiassparrow.livejournal.com]

No! Even then you're holding him back and probably tempting him from doing greater things. Like getting it on with his mortal enemy. Very important, that.

[meganbmoore.livejournal.com]

Or his brother...or his ward...or his best friend...or his respected rival...

[redbrunja.livejournal.com]

"Murphy isn’t good enough for Harry"

Oh, no they didn't.

*growls*

Frankly, I'm still annoyed that SPOILER! Murphy and Harry TALKED ABOUT WHAT THEY WANTED IN A RELATIONSHIP before having sex. (Which is very healthy for them, but I am so annoyed that I missed out on them making love.)

[meganbmoore.livejournal.com]

Oh, that was so my reaction. You want to piss me off, you use any variety of "she isn't good enough" or "he could do better," (regardless of if it's my ship or not and ESPECIALLY-and it almost always is-if you're a woman) you want to REALLY piss me off? You make it be about a woman you are CLEARLY threatened by because she doesn't fit your narrow views of what a good heroine is (which is most people's problem with Murphy...she isn't "strong like a man" enough for some, and not "feminine" enough for others.)

I've read all the books, so no spoiler for me, really. (Unless you have an advenced copy of the one coming out in a few months, in which case, I hate you on principle.)

I think they still have a ways to go before having sex...like, Harry needs to figure out that that target he has painted can't get any bigger than it already is...oh, and that yes, she really CAN handle all aspects of his life(really, it's sweet and charming how he knows she can kick his butt and go toe-to-toe with demons, but still tries to be protective, but really, he's going to get clocked for it one of these days...)

[redbrunja.livejournal.com]

*nods*

Now, there are pairings where I think, 'one of these characters is better than the other' but that is usually due to writers screwing the pooch. And when it's clear that people are saying that because they're threatened by her or she's OMG! blocking the slash! I get so, so annoyed.

As for the Dresden books, I'm actually about a book behind at this point. And I need to give the whole series a reread - it's been a long while since I read the early ones.

See, as for sex, I'm all for the having sex that makes everything more complicated. But I keep getting so frustrated with Butcher - I really feel like he keeps teasing us with the Murphey/Harry.

really, it's sweet and charming how he knows she can kick his butt and go toe-to-toe with demons, but still tries to be protective, but really, he's going to get clocked for it one of these days...)

I love there dynamic - his chivalry bouncing off her miss tough chick of the universe aura. Good times.

[meganbmoore.livejournal.com]

In almost any pairing, one character is "better" than the other, but it's not about one being better than the other or finding an exact equal, but rather, about their being suited to each other.

I'm used to being teased endlessly about my OTPs until whoever is at the helm gets around to moving them forward...I'm used to waiting years for it to go from "blatantly obvious but unspoken" to "happening" and others have drawn it out way more than Butcher has.

Harry is 100% susceptible to anything vaguely resembling an "in distress," be it damsel, kitten, or mortal enemy. I think Murphey is used to it by now.

I actually used to see a LOT of the Murphey bashing because she was "too mean to" or "too hard on" or "not understanding enough" of Harry. The thing is...HE DESERVES IT. Yeah, WE know his reasons, and that he's trying to protect her, but it doesn't change the fact that she's a cop, and he's screwing with her job AND her life. And HE knows that he deserves it, too. That fact that he means well and wants to protect her doesn't change that.

I just hadn't seen it in a while(a couple years, actually), and the increased popularity because of the show seems to have brought it back.

[redbrunja.livejournal.com]

"Harry is 100% susceptible to anything vaguely resembling an "in distress," be it damsel, kitten, or mortal enemy. I think Murphey is used to it by now."

Yes. I love the scene when he invites The Archive into his home, and then names her. I about died from the sweetness.

"I actually used to see a LOT of the Murphey bashing because she was "too mean to" or "too hard on" or "not understanding enough" of Harry. The thing is...HE DESERVES IT. Yeah, WE know his reasons, and that he's trying to protect her, but it doesn't change the fact that she's a cop, and he's screwing with her job AND her life. And HE knows that he deserves it, too. That fact that he means well and wants to protect her doesn't change that."

That makes me want to smack a bitch so hard. And reminds me of the Katara hate that seems to be lurking in a couple ugly corners of Avatar fandom right now. Cause cause forbid a women be justifiably angry at Zuko, ever.

And with Harry... yeah. In the first book, Murphey never would have gotten stung if he had been straight with her, and in a later one, he got a girl killed by trying to be protective. I think (hope) he's learning that it doesn't work like that, and he can cause more harm than good by being over protective.

[meganbmoore.livejournal.com]

Harry has the world's biggest "knight in shining armor" complex. Murphey and Thomas realize this and know that he must be saved from his own overly heroic impulses.

"And with Harry... yeah. In the first book, Murphey never would have gotten stung if he had been straight with her, and in a later one, he got a girl killed by trying to be protective. I think (hope) he's learning that it doesn't work like that, and he can cause more harm than good by being over protective."

I'm not sure exactly which book you're on, but someone purely platonic enters his life at one point, and I think she's kinda helping to force him past that. Plus, he and Murphey now go on busts and stakeouts and such together and dish out Tough Love as a single entity. It's progress.

[lyssie.livejournal.com]

Bob only being gay for Harry is generally a joke. I can't speak to book-verse, but tv-verse Bob wants Harry's power, even if it sometimes worries him.

And, dammit, even TV Murphy is way too good for Harry. They work as friends, but she'd need to shoot him in a week, and no one would blame her.

[meganbmoore.livejournal.com]

Murphy in either verse is on a whole other league from Harry, and he knows it(a lot more than she does.) Which is part of the charm.

I've seen "Bob is gay for Harry" as the joke...and I've seen it as serious slash.

You definitely need to read the books. Much as I love the TV show, the books(after the first few) are a whole other level of awesome.

[alexandral.livejournal.com]

Any hater of Murphy should die. :D It is Susan who I personally have a problem with.

I tolerate "strange and wonderful" ships as long as there is no character bashing, I don't see a problem for me. As in : someone else gets paired with Harry, but there is no bashing of Murphy (or "she is not worthy of him" nonsense).

An abundance of guy/guy fiction in so many fandoms with clearly "straight" characters, as in "Supernatural", for example, seems to be a cultural question for me. I almost want to make a psychological analysis why this happens (if I knew anything about psychology!!).

Is this a fashion that will pass with time when gay relationships will be widely accepted everywhere? As in : because "guy and girl are old and boring" but "guy and guy have an edge to it" ?

Or is it because the female character is often viewed as a rival by female fans? And a male character is not a rival but just another object of desire so you get "two for the price of one", so to speak? I honestly don't know but it is interesting why there are so many female writers who write guy/guy..

MURPHY AND HARRY HAVING SEX???????? WHICH BOOK????????

[meganbmoore.livejournal.com]

I have no issues with Susan, really. She's no Murphey, but at least she tries, and there's a lot worse out there.

Despite the fact the Harry/Murphey is of the "OMG! ONE OF MY BIGGEST OTPS EVAH!!!" variety, I actually am surprisingly open to the idea of one of them with someone else, as long as it makes sense. Largely, I think, because Butcher has it pretty clearly set up so that they actually are the best, most perfect choice for each other(well, she's the most perfect choice for him) but their worlds are too different and he's probably too screwed up for it to ever happen.

I honestly believe it's the rivalry, no matter how much it's denied. I actually went into it a bit at dangermousie's LJ yesterday. My thing is that most of the characters who get slashed are characters where at least one has a canonical love interest, and any time you slash her love interest, you are removing the female-in part or whole-from her role in the story and giving it to a male, period. I have no respect whatsoever for anything that involves women cutting women out of their roles in fiction. The slashers themselves? I've found plenty I like and respect. But anytime they do that, I don't respect what they're doing, no matter how it's explained(and I've had it explained a lot, and even the best description doesn't sound like anything but a well-worded justification for wish-fulfillment.) Something like the Supernatural fandom pisses me off for similar reasons, because they throw hissy fits at double-x chromosomes getting within a hundred yards of their beloved boys.

And, seriously, if the creator portrays the character as straight and ESPECIALLY if they give the guy a love interest, then they mean for the character to be seen as straight. Period. No amount of "subtext" you think you see(and you can claim to see "subtext" in any interaction between 2 characters ever if you want to...it's just an excuse) is going to change that.

No sex yet(poor Harry...) just wishful thinking.